What the church can learn from AA

Over the past few weeks I have been part of an on going dialogue with some of my buddies regarding the meaning of THE CHURCH. Our conversation has taken place over the past three weeks via email and has caused us each to stop, think, and ponder the meaning of THE CHURCH. I don’t have the room or space to mention all that we have discovered and talked about. I do however, have time to mention a few things.

Anytime I think of the meaning of THE CHURCH I read, “I stand by the Door” by Sam Shumaker, one of the spiritual fathers of Alcoholics Anonymous. The poem chronicles how Sam views his role within THE CHURCH as he remains and stands by the door. After reading the poem I said to myself, “self, it is time to see if Sam wrote anything else that might be of interest.” You know what, he did. I stumbled across an article entitled, “What the Church can Learn from AA.” The article noted the words Shumaker spoke at an AA gathering in St. Louis with thousands celebrating 20 years of sobriety. Shumaker uses 1 Corinthians 1:26 as the key text for his speech. “God chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise. God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong.”

According to Shumaker there are four things that the Church can learn from AA. Read on and you will find out the four things along with some direct quotes from Shumaker that pertain to each point:

1. Recognize the Need

   The first thing I think the church needs to learn from AA is that nobody gets anywhere till he recognizes a clearly-defined need. These people do not come to AA to get made a little better. They do not come because the best people are doing it. They come because they are desperate. They are not ladies and gentlemen looking for a religion; they are utterly desperate men and women in search of redemption.

2. Redeemed Life Changing Fellowship

   At once a new person takes his place in this redeeming, life-changing fellowship. He may be changed today, and out working tomorrow – no long senseless delays about giving away what he’s got. He’s ready to give the little he has the moment it comes to him. The fellowship that redeemed him will wither and die unless he and others like him get in and keep that fellowship moving and growing by reaching others.

3. Definite Personal Dealing with People

   I think many in the church see ourselves as we should like to appear to others, not as we are before God. We need drastic personal dealing and challenge. Who is ready and trained to give it to us? How many of us have ever taken a “fearless moral inventory” of ourselves, and dared make the depth of our need known to any other human being? This gets at the pride which is the hindrance and sticking-point for so many us, and which, for most of us in the church, has never been recognized, let alone faced or dealt with.

4. Necessity for a Real Change of Heart

   As we come Sunday after Sunday, year after year, we are supposed to be in a process of transformation. Are we? The AA’s are. At each meeting there are people seeking and in conscious need. Everybody is puling for the people who speak, and looking for more insight and help. They are pushed by their need. They are pulled by their inspiration of others who are growing. They are society of the “before and after,” with a clear line of between the old life and new life. This is not the difference between sinfulness and perfection, but it is the difference between accepted wrongdoing and the genuine beginning of a new way of life.

   
   

I love it when...

I had one of those moments last night that make you smile and say to yourself, “I love it when that happens.” Almost instantaneously after this thought another one came to my noggin, “I need to blog about this.” So, here it is, a list entitled: I love it when… (In no particular order and by no means an exhaustive list).

I love it when….

• Finley walks over to Maya when she is crying and pats her back to maker her feel better. Not only that, but she will normally place her head on her somewhere in order to give her a love and the assurance that it will be alright. (This in fact is what happened last night and is serving as the catalyst to this list).
• I walk into my bedroom at night and hear Heather snoring. For this is the only time I know for sure that she is sleeping. Let’s face it; a sleeping wife is a good thing.
• I enter into a fascinating conversation at work with a new member, an existing member, or co-worker.
• I hear Finley call everything “dada,” that is except for her mama which she affectionately calls by name.
• Maya asks me in the morning, “Daddy is a stay at home day?”
• I am part of making things wrong, right again. It‘s called justice, ladies and gentleman. I love being a part of justice.
• I have one of those lengthy conversations, the kind that lasts for days because there is no end to it. The kind of conversation that is multi-layered, thought provoking, and full of implication and application.
• I make my sister think.
• My mom comes and hangs out with my girls and me.
• Heather gives me “the look.” The look that says, “I love you, let’s do it and make it happen. We are in this together.”
• When things come together for Tessera Community Church.
• My wife let's me ramble on and on and on. I mean, I love it when my wife listens to me and let's me share what is on my heart and mind.
  
• A new insight is gleaned through my Bible reading or my listening to a message either in person or on my ipod.
• Everyone in the house is asleep and I am the only one awake sitting in the family room reading a good book.
• I feel the arms of my Savior holding me tight.
• I have alone time with my wife.
• I have alone time with Maya.
• I have alone time with Finley.
  
• Maya says to me, “don’t leave yet daddy. We haven’t had our cuddle time yet.”
• Maya and Finley follow me to the door every morning to say one last good bye as I walk out on my way to work.
• I Play blocks and barbies with Maya. You see, I have to build the blocks into a castle so Maya’s barbies can have a place to live and sleep.
• I am speechless at God’s nature.
• I wow my boss and co-workers.
• I make other people smile.
• I get the chance to be the “goofy uncle” to my nieces and nephews.
• I am sitting at the table with all my family.
• I get a chance to take my girls to McDonald’s to hang out with Mom-mom and Pop-pop and all of their friends.
• When Maya makes Finley laugh.
• Hears stories of faith and transformation.
• I get to notch the belt in one more notch.
• Maya won't let anyone leave her with out giving them hugs and kisses.
  

I guess I could go on and on but I am going to stop now. Like I said, the list was presented in no particular order and it is not an exhaustive list. I am sure as soon as I press post I know I will think of a couple more items to add to the list; that’s life though. Take care and enjoy creating and completing the following sentence for your own life, “I love it when….”

I know, I am in trouble...

Let's be clear - I know! I know what you are going to say once I share the following conversation that I had with Maya, my four year old daughter who just might be going on twenty four. Just this past week the following conversation took place between Maya and I while Heather, Maya, and I were relaxing in the evening watching America's Funniest Home Video's (a family favorite).

To begin with, Maya and I were on the floor laying down next to each other. She was using a pillow for her head and I was using my left arm. When, all of a sudden, Maya propped up and galloped over to Heather to sit on her lap. Upon seeing this, I said.

"Maya, can I borrow your pillow?" (By the way, it's not her pillow. It is a "couch" pillow. I was just being nice.)
"No."
Before Heather or I could respond Maya looked Heather in the eyes and said.
"Mommy, I think I need a pillow while I am on your lap. My head hurts."
"What? You don't need a pillow"
"O.K. mommy." Maya says as she climbs out of Heather's lap and back onto the floor next to me so that she can put her head back on her pillow just to keep me from using one. (Do you sense any resentment yet?)
I couldn't see Heather's facial expression for two reasons. First of all, my back was turned away from her. Secondly, if I did look back all I would have seen is a green pillow flying towards my face. I know this because a green pillow eventually landed on my face. My wife so loving tossed me a pillow so my I no longer needed my arm. Upon seeing all of this Maya responds by saying.
"Mommy, I think I need another pillow cause me feet are getting tired and I need to put them up."
"What? Your fine you don't need another one."
This time Heather and I turn to each other to catch a glimpse of our facial expressions. However, the glimpse only lasted for so long because Maya ended up pulling the pillow out from underneath my head so that she cold place it under her feet.

So, there I was without a pillow under my head lying next to my daughter who was glowing because she one upped her father while listening to my wife chuckle as she shook her head in amazement pondering over the fact that it is only going to get worse.